I had found this looking at job sites...Two things made me laugh can you tell which two...


Haiti Earthquake Security Officers (Miami/Dade County)

We are currently accepting applications for 75 ARMED HAITIAN EARTHQUAKE SECURITY OFFICERS for contingency operations in the South Florida area.

This job is a GOVERNMENT CONTRACT under the Department of Homeland Security. 24-48 HOUR response time is needed in order to process all required documentation.

Excellent pay starting at $18 per hour x 1.5 base pay for overtime. 8 and 12 hour shifts, 7 days a week when activated.
In-processing may begin as soon as Thursday 28 January 2010. Location TBD
ARMS provides all uniforms/excluding footwear (black boots preferred).
ARMS provides weapons and gun belts/ammo.
You will be entered into the Homeland Security Database after appropriate clearance.
Clearance includes:

Current State of Florida D and G license.
Cleared background check.
Two sets of prints submitted: ARMS will have personnel on-site for electronic prints: No charge to officer.
Clean drug test submitted no older than 6 months. (ARMS will have an account set up at LabCorp no charge to officer)
Must have ability to get to site-location. (Car, bus, taxi, carpool, mom)
DO NOT SUBMIT INFORMATION IF YOU USED DRUGS IN THE PAST 60 DAYS!

Mom? Hahahaha